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My Best Friend Ditched Me For the Popular Girls

My Best Friend Ditched Me For the Popular Girls

Don't get me wrong, I think it's awesome that my friend is branching out. But she is branching out to the boy-crazy, loud, so-called "popular" group. She thought they were so mean last year, and now she is hanging out with them just because it will make her more "popular.”  Any advice?

There are few things worse than losing your best friend to the popular crowd, a crushing experience forever immortalized in Mean Girls. Even though Cady is only hanging out with Regina and her gaggle of vapid, Caltene-obsessed friends to get back at them—supposedly?!—it's still a pretty scarring experience for Janis and Damien. Unfortunately, real life isn't always like the movies (if only we could all be so lucky to have Tina Fey for an English teacher).

While the Plastics might be immortalized on-screen, popular girls are everywhere IRL. No matter where you go to school or where you live, there's always *that* group with these same qualities: boy crazy, exclusive, and (usually) catty to those who aren’t deemed cool enough to be included. It's kinda crazy, actually, how impossible it is to escape them. The silver(ish) lining? The fact that we’ve experienced our own version of the popular girls means we have plenty of advice to share.

We're also just going to skip over the whole “life's not a popularity contest” and “being popular doesn't mean anything” wisdom because it's totally not helpful here. When you’re experiencing it every day, it means a lot—and it sucks. Trust us; we’ve been there and we know how miserable (not to mention lonely) being rejected or ostracized is. But you haven’t lost your friend yet. The first thing we'd recommend is straight-up talking to her in a casual way. Open up the lines of communication so that nobody can claim that they were the one who was wronged. Plus, you might be able to stop any drama before it starts.

Maybe she wishes all of you could be friends and thinks you don’t like them. Or maybe she wants to have lots of different kinds of friends. And there’s nothing wrong with that, because every friendship is different. Your friend might also come to her senses and realize these friends aren't her real friends; then she’ll apologize for ditching you, and everything will be great again. But that also might not happen. Popularity is fickle and fleeting, but getting a taste of it does weird things to your mind. (Proof: Basically all of Hollywood.)

Also, try to hang out together. All of you. That way you won't feel left out, and who knows—maybe they aren't so awful? It's at least worth giving them a shot. But keep in mind: If they force you to wear pink on Wednesdays, you have our permission to never speak to them again.

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